Have you ever asked a girl for tit pics, then have her to turn around and say no, even though you want to see her tits…but you aren’t willing to invest the energy to try and romance her and trick her into sending her tit pics…only to have her send you pics of her pussy instead…which is what you wanted but way more than you asked for…but can’t help but wonder what the fuck is wrong with her tits…while staring at her pussy?
 
The problem with technology is that while it has made the every day girl more of a whore willing to post half naked pics on their Instagram for all the boys to celebrate them…it has also killed off a breed of very magical girls: the street whore…which you may not really notice or feel now that you don’t have to leave your house, but it is a family tradition to hire at least one every once in a while to give back to the community and last night I drove around for hours looking for one…and when I found her, I barely wanted to fuck with her…because the kind of girl who is still hanging on and who hasn’t adapted to technology or massage parlors is the kind of girl you don’t really want to help because she’s probably better off dead, if she’s not dead already…
 
I think I am in love…

She’s only done this one photoshoot and she fucking kills it. She looks barely legal, from the Philippines, and already making moves in the right direction to be more relevant…according to me…because she’s naked in amazing photoshoots…unlike all the boring girls who aren’t.

She’s so tight bodied, soft looking and amazing…
 
The best thing about ghetto stripclubs isn’t the naked girls willing to have sex for money, it’s the memories that we can carry on this journey that is life…you know, the things you would write about in your memoir if you knew how to write, you illiterate fuck.
 
I am looking for love in all the wrong places…like the back alley behind the stripclub where the girls smoke…because strippers like porn chicks don’t know how to love…thanks to not having dads.
 
The Internet has made me soft. There was a time I’d be outside looking at whores, fucking with whores, fucking whores…but nowadays I just message them on Facebook, they ignore me, so I jerk off to their vacation pics, and we leave it at. 

Her name is Abby, her rate is Php2500 a pop and she does all her meet-ups at Pasong Tamo in Makati. When you see her, say hi to the bitch for me.
 
My new play is the fake auto-correct. My favorite is repeatedly writing “Let’s bang, let’s bang, let’s hang, sorry autocorrect”…but that’s some vanilla shit. The ultimate, if you’re talking to the right girl, is “hey, I want to bend you over like the hooker that you are and shove my fist in your ass so hard you shit yourself all over my face, all while squealing like a pig”…and following up with “OMG AUTOCORRECT!” The texting her what you meant to say was “hey, I want to go out for Chinese food and a movie, are you down?” and then blaming the iPhone for being so crazy and having a mind of it’s own.
 
Some annoying homeless chick who I assume isn’t homeless but just randomly screams at people when you walk by her asking for change asked me for change and I said something like “do you have any skills that would make me want to give you money?” I was thinking she’d do a song or dance. She said she was good at sucking dick…so she did…suck my dick…and I only gave her 20 pesos…now I must wash.

I may also need to find a girl with more teeth to redeem that low point in my day, that really wasn’t all that low, considering I suck at life and the day as a whole sucked more than she sucked…if you know what I mean.
 
Liz Naluz gets it. She’s a Pinay model who understands that being half-naked for magazines with the promise of lots of money and fame and celebrity boyfriends is a far better strategy than being sold to dirty old men for the better life…not that either really phase her, she’s from the Philippines and being from the Philippines means she’s got no soul.
 
Samantha Yen is some Pinay model who, based on this lingerie photoshoot, is pretty fucking amazing. I know nothing about her, but I kind of want to spend the rest of my life with her…and have kids with her…or least with these pics of her…if only my printer had ink.