Let’s get back into the nitty gritty of judging movies based solely on their names and maybe their posters or commercials, if I’ve seen them. Totally valid form of film criticism.

THOR: THE DARK WORLD

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I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that even if this film is complete bollocks, it’d still be worth the price of admission just to see Tom Hiddleston’s Loki again. As far as I’m concerned, too much Loki is never a bad thing.

CAPTAIN PHILLIPS

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Of course this will be one of the biggest release this month and of course critics will like it. Tom Hanks could shit on a coffee filter and throw it at a baby and it would score at least 30% on Rotten Tomatoes. So this movie is about pirates or cereal or a 70’s band, no one knows and no one cares. It’s Tom Hanks, just give him his acting award and we’ll all move on.

SHE’S THE ONE

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A movie about Dingdong Dantes and Enrique Gil fighting over Bea Alonzo?  No.

 



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