Melody Thornton is some former Pussycat Doll who didn’t make enough money as a Pussycat Doll to get her teeth fixed, but who was able to avoid a career as a stripper, like all the Pussycat Dolls.

Now I am forced to remember her as the only slut in a white bikini that isn’t see-through when wet…when that is the whole basis and foundation of a white fucking bikini. My god, Melody Thornton! What are you doing with your life? Where did it all go wrong? More importantly, WHERE ARE THE FUCKING NIPPLES, BITCH?!

For those of you who don’t know, I am very passionate about white bikinis. I am a firm believer that they are sent here from Heaven to share the woman form without the woman really knowing, and I’ve been on the frontlines of this war a.k.a. the public pools where so many labia have passed me by and offered me something to masturbate to…all thanks to my friend the white bikini…a friend no more thanks to this nobody fun killer, ruining it for everyone.

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